By Chloe Halpin
Between dating apps and viral “ick” videos, instant judgment has become the norm. Romantic comedies, however, still celebrate patience, awkwardness, and real connection.
Romantic comedies can shape how we view love. They can raise our standards and remind us not to settle. In How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Andy, played by Kate Hudson, intentionally tests Ben, played by Matthew McConaughey, to see if he will walk away from her as part of an article she is writing. She does everything she can to push him away, breaking down over a dead plant, insisting on couples therapy after only a few dates, and planning their “future baby’s” photo album. In most real-life situations, many people would leave.
Although he initially remains because of a bet, as the relationship develops, his feelings become genuine. He continues to fight for the relationship rather than walking away at the first sign of difficulty. By the end of the movie, he chooses to stay not because of the bet, but because he truly cares about Andy.
This movie illustrates that high standards don’t chase the right people away. The film suggests that the right person won’t disappear at the first sign of intensity or imperfection. They stay long enough to see who you really are.
Romcoms remind us that you don’t have to put yourself in a box or make yourself less than to make things work. Take Poppy, played by Emily Bader, in People We Meet on Vacation. She’s unapologetically herself, and Alex, played by Tom Blyth, her opposite in nearly every way, adapts to her energy rather than forcing her to change. That slow-burn friendship and eventual romance isn’t perfect or instant, but it illustrates a key lesson romcoms keep teaching: when you’re authentic, the right people will stay and grow with you.
These narratives reinforce the idea that patience and authenticity are rewarded in love. Don’t try to understand your every feeling, just let things be. Most importantly, be your most eccentric self, love everything so deeply, and what’s meant for you will be there when it’s meant to.
While romcoms have a way of romanticising every detail, love today often unfolds very differently through social media and dating apps. Platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and apps like Tinder or Hinge have reshaped how people approach crushes, dating, and even casual flings. Instead of allowing connections to grow naturally, we are encouraged to evaluate potential partners instantly. We swipe left and right, analysing photos, prompts, height, interests, reducing a person to a few curated details on a screen.
Viral videos discussing “icks” encourage us to scan for flaws or label certain behaviours as “cringey,” which can make it difficult to fully enjoy getting to know someone. Even a single awkward interaction can dominate our attention, causing us to lose interest before a connection has a chance to develop.
Romantic comedies often idealise the idea of meeting someone unexpectedly, in a bookstore, on vacation, or through years of friendship. Dating apps turn love into something searchable, filterable, and sortable.
Dating apps have made attraction feel immediate and disposable. We scroll, swipe, and decide within seconds whether someone is worth our time. A single detail can outweigh genuine curiosity. Rom coms allow for tension to build, awkwardness to exist and for feelings to develop with time. They allow characters to misunderstand each other, grow, and try again. Romcoms don’t just depict love, they shape our expectations of it.
In a world where swipe culture is normalised, the question isn’t whether romcoms are unrealistic; it’s whether we’ve grown so used to judging connections on a screen that we’ve forgotten how to meet people organically. Maybe it’s time to put the phone down, let awkwardness happen, and allow real connections to grow in their own time, just like romcoms have been showing us all along.